Working Mom

After working full-time for 11 years before staying home with a baby, I struggled with being a stay-at-home mom. I struggled with my lack of accomplishments, my lack of control over my day, my lack of kudos from colleagues or supervisors. It took three years before I felt like I got into a groove--some very part-time work, a little pre-school for the kids, a few structured activities for me.

Even so, I sometimes lust after a little more work outside the home. It is nice to have that sense of independence and stimulation. Nice to feel like I am adding some money to the family (though I love what a mentor told me--"there are two ways to add money in a family, income and SAVINGS." I am saving by being at home). But I confess, part of it for me is the desire to be recognized and valued as a smart, creative thinker. As wonderful and encouraging and appreciative as our husbands may be, they are related to us and love us and have to support us. It's nice to have someone not related to you pat you on the back. Is this a weakness? How do we combat this need?

Right now, I do not desire to work full-time while my children are so little. But I would if I needed to. When I have worked in the past five years, I have been committed to only doing what would help my family AND not harm my family. For me, that means, I cannot agree to do something that is putting stress on our family. That is one thing I don't miss about full-time job.... stress.

I have liked a verse in Psalm 90:17 this week: "Establish the work of our hands for us--yes, establish the work of our hands." This has been a prayer for me this week as I wonder about my work.